Hassle-free House Cleaning

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Hassle-free House Cleaning

Cleaning is the bane of my life. It is something that is forever on my mind when I'm at home and I constantly feel guilty as I will do absolutely anything to get out of it.

It ends up becoming second nature to ignore the sticky surfaces, muddy paw prints, dust and endless amount of crumbs. I have become somewhat of an expert if I do say so myself, in the art of making the house appear clean. I remember seeing one of those e-card things on Facebook where it said 'I get more cleaning done in the 10 minutes before someone comes over than I do all week' and that pretty much sums up my cleaning habits.

The 10 Minute Sprint

In that 10 minutes before company arrives, it is simply amazing what you can achieve. Don’t worry - this wont turn into one of those cleaning blogs that are guaranteed to use phrases like 'spick and span' and suggest a routine, a printable cleaning plan and 712 things you can use a lemon for. If you didn't feel absolutely useless before reading one of those then your left feeling positively weeping at your own sheer cleaning inadequacy. So that’s where my 10 minute clean/tidy up comes in and all you need to do is follow the few simple points below:

  • Purchase lots of anti-bacterial cleaning wipes - I'm talking Costco size batches. They can and will, clean anything, apart from the kids. Get wiping
  • A bottle of bleach (yes a bottle, if you don't need a gas mask then you haven't used enough) down the toilet the visitors will be using along with the sink and any bath/shower drains. Who doesn't think clean when they smell bleach?!
  • Remember to stick out a clean hand towel; the towel you used to dry the dog off after their walk sadly will not suffice
  • Glass cleaner/furniture polish for obvious spots in the living room/hall/vestibule. Don't bother with high up or low down spots - remember you are not on a TV show where people come over and rip into you about the state of your home
  • Throw anything obvious lying around in a cupboard; kids too if you feel like it, pretend it's a den, they'll love it, it'll be fine
  • Quick hoover (BUT if you have a build-a-hoover like I do and need an engineering degree to transform it into a hoover then use a dustpan and brush. And seriously contemplate buying a less ridiculous hoover)
  • Dishes into the dishwasher or quickly handwash and leave to dry on the draining board
  • Take out the rubbish and recycling. Friends are not supposed to judge but do you really want them seeing all the empty wine bottles and McDonalds wrappers? Not everyone understands that kids simply love McDonalds so it's for their benefit really and wine is just a necessity. Actually, if they don't understand this are they really worth having as friends?
  • Run a brush through your hair and change out of the jogging bottoms and skanky t-shirt.

The Cleaning Guru

Of course, there is another way that avoids your no cleaning guilt and running around like Kim Kardashian trying to get the un-airbrushed pictures of her backside off the internet; hire a cleaner.

Hiring a cleaner is guilt free - they want to do it, you pay them to do it and in this difficult climate, you are giving someone a job. Everyone has busy lives and trying to juggle a family, home, pets, career, studying, social life etc is HARD. Who has the time or inclination left to thoroughly clean and research the best cleaning products to use and all the things salt and vinegar can be used for other than fish and chips? Cleaners however, know this stuff and they are good at it. Imagine having that thoroughly clean home that you haven't driven yourself into an early grave for! You will be surprised as to how much easier life is when someone else is tackling the cleaning and will help reduce your stress levels from top of the beanstalk territory. Who knows, you may even want to encourage the kids to help with chores around the house by turning it into something fun for them to do. You'll have more time and patience to supervise them leading to positive feedback from a caring, loving parent as opposed to screaming at them like a Real Housewife on a wives trip away. Put on some music and get dancing whilst cleaning, although, it may be best to avoid artists such as Rihanna and Drake; trying to instil some values in the kids remember.

We need to stop beating ourselves up and feeling guilty about everything; not cleaning enough/hiring a cleaner, not spending enough 'quality' time with the kids/partner, buying an expensive pair of shoes, forgetting to reply to texts/return missed calls or buying that wine glass that can take a whole bottle of wine. We all need to live for the moment and try to be happy here and now. One of the ways to achieve that - get that task posted on Task Junkies for a cleaner.


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